Q’s Rants: Losing Body Heat, or How I Learned to Respect Winter

For those of you who have not been reading this thing since its inception, this blog used to be titled “Q’s Rants…and Other Things.”  Yes, I was an awful writer at the time, and this was an awful name for the blog, but the point was simple…it was a place for me to vent frustrations, or to simply rant about whatever I saw fit (clearly I was a much more angry individual at that time…much unlike the bubbly personality you see before you today!)  As my blog has transitioned into a more mature vessel for my much more enlightened and epic prose, the ranting aspect of things around here started to decline, as you might expect!  Also, with how awesome my life tends to be (and, trust me, it continues to amaze me), there becomes much less to rant about.

With all that being said, every now and then, a truly epic rant needs to be unleashed.  The fiery sword of my words needs to cut through certain topics like a hot knife through butter.  The rants will be few and far between, as anger is not healthy, and usually something I only reserve for sports!  The rants will be directed only at those topics which truly deserve it!  I’m reminded of what Aristotle said:  “Anybody can become angry — that is easy, but to be angry with the right person and to the right degree and at the right time and for the right purpose, and in the right way — that is not within everybody's power and is not easy.”  Ranting is a powerful sword, when wielded carefully.  I intend to abuse that line, but only every so often.

With that, I present to you the first of a new series of posts I’d like to call Q’s Rants!

I’m cold.  Right now, as I’m typing this, I am cold.  When I woke up this morning, I was cold.  Then again, it was 30 degrees outside, it was 5:30 in the morning, and I was scraping ice off my windshield.  It’s supposed to be cold then.  Right now I’m sitting inside of an office building, away from the elements, with the thermostat set at a “comfortable” 68 degrees.  I should not be cold, but I am.

WHAT.  THE. ACTUAL.  FUCK!*

There was a time in my youth when I would never get cold.  I remember going to Lake Tahoe over Winter Break with Sara and her family…and I was walking around outside, in a snowstorm, in a T-Shirt, Shorts, and Sandals…and the snow was melting before it reached my skin.  I’ve been told, back in my youthful days, that I was a walking personal heater; a very useful thing to have around, mind you.  Heat would radiate off my body!  I was so warm that I had heat to spare for those around me!

Boy, how times have changed.  I’m cold all the time, now.  Always.  It never stops!  My parents this year, for Christmas, decided to go with the theme of “keeping Patrick warm” in their gift giving.  I got coats, sweatshirts, gloves, and a new bed blanket…an impressive spread!  And all very much appreciated!  Because I’m always cold!  (My parents really do pay attention to me…they must like me or something.)

I have to say, I live in California for a reason!  That reason, mostly, is because this is where I was born and raised, and therefore I have roots here.  But the other reason, and the far more important reason for my purposes here, is because we allegedly do not have winter here!  I remember, just last January, we had a string of glorious days in the 70s!  I mean, that’s winter!  70 and sunny.  That’s something I can handle.  Today, its in the upper 40s and kinda cold.  We had a hard freeze over night.  When did I move to Chicago? (I’d totally move to Chicago…you know, if I didn’t have damn good reasons to stay here, that is).

Needless to say, I have a new, healthy respect for winter now.  I think it started back in February of 2012 when Dustin and I were in Minnesota.  We were walking from Al’s Breakfast to the Metrodome, and my face started to freeze to the point I was having trouble talking.  That’s damn cold!  I immediately went to the Mall of America, bought a new hat with ear and cheek flaps, and some new, thicker gloves so my hands would stop throbbing in pain.  Then, over the summer, I’d start getting cold on the foggier mornings.  I used to put my sweatshirts away between March and November.  And I started realizing, you know, I get cold now!  Finally, this winter, its been all over.  I’m a fully fledged weather pansy.  I just can’t take it anymore.  I want to be warm all the time.  Take me to Hawaii and let me thaw out a bit! 

So, yeah, winter.  Well played, sir.  I may have won some early battles, but you are clearly winning the war.  I’ll take my beating and go put on a jacket now…and some gloves…and maybe a puff-ball hat with some ear flaps and ropes hanging down past my shoulders!  Yeah, then I’ll be super warm!

So that’s my story, thanks for listening. The end!**

*Sorry for the swearing, mom!

**Yeah, I straight up stole that last sentence from someone.  Thank you!  ;)