MMR: Alpha Male Syndrome

In the most primal nature of all animals, it is the alpha male who gets to mate with the females in the group. The alpha lion, the alpha tiger, etc. The alpha asserts his dominance by beating the crap outta the other males in the group; proving that no one can fuck with him, that everyone else is weak, and that only he is worthy of being the yin to the females' yang, so to speak.

Apparently this behavior is visceral to all animals, including humans.

We tend to think of ourselves, humans, as much more civilized and domesticated than others who join us in the animal kingdom. We live in buildings, use toilets, have technology, and have a code of laws and rules by which to live by. But, when it comes to the mating process, in many ways, we are very much like our animal brethren.

What I'm referring to here is called AMOGing someone...setting yourself up as the "leader of men" by reducing their status in the group. (AMOG stands for Alpha-Male Of the Group) This can be done by snide comments about what they are doing or their livelihoods, giving a guys secrets away (like if a guy is running a favorite like at a bar, and his buddy goes "oh, is he telling that story again? does that line ever work?"), or even, in the most extreme of cases, resorting to acting like the playground bully. There are ways I've learned to get around this, but this isn't the time or place for that discussion. The important part here is, that it happens a lot.

The personal example that spurred on this line of rambling (but well worded) thought: a buddy of mine was hanging out with a new girl of his, and when I walked in, he started making fun of my parents buying things for me for my new apartment. Talking about how he paid for all of his shit himself. Now, I'm not particularly thin skinned or anything, it didn't bother me in a "hurt feelings" type of way or anything. But what got me was that, had he not been with this girl, he would have been most pleased with what I had brought back to furnish this apartment with (and, in the end, he was), but because he was hanging out with this new girl, he felt the need to try and belittle me to bolster himself up.

I don't want to get into how stupid the actual line of razzing was: about how I didn't ask my parents to get me anything, and how cool it was that they were willing to help me out; about how it made him look like a jerk for making fun of me having a close relationship with my parents, etc. The real interesting point of this, and the one that lends itself perfectly to the point I think I want to make at the end of all this is, why did he act the way he did when she was around? It was completely contradictory to how he acts when hanging out with me normally.

Clearly, at the most basic level, I was a threat.

Now, obviously, realistically, he knows I'm not going to try and steal his girl. To be honest, this particular girl would have no chance keeping me in check and I'd run all over her...not good. But something in his mind told him he needed to subtlely exclude me as a potential mate in front of her. And its retarded. It's amazing how civilized we try to make ourselves, and yet we still resort to our most basic instincts when it comes to love and attraction. We stop using our brains and start using our gut.

Guys should be smart enough to know that their friend isn't going to steal his girl away from him (and if you can't be sure about that, they are a terrible friend...which I know happens a lot). They should have the brain power to overcome these instincts and tell themselves "hey, he's your bro, don't fuck with him." But the power of the pussy is great, and it fucks with many a man's head. To many, AMOGing other guys in the room, even their friends, increases their chances of getting laid (preying on a girl's visceral nature to want to be with the man they feel safest around and who can protect them).

It just seems to me that, in an age where humans are pretty sophisticated and rather civil (comparatively...I'm not getting into the whole "animals don't start wars" bullshit), we should be able to find females who like us without belittling those around us to make ourselves appear more desierable.

Or maybe I'm asking too much...human relations are fucking weird.