There is a popular, completely cliche saying that goes something like "you learn something new every day." I'm not entirely sure how true that really is, but I can tell you this, you learn something new every time you go to Las Vegas!
In case you have been living under a rock, or have stumbled on this blog by mistake and have no idea who I am, I went to Vegas this past weekend. I love the Vegas. Its one of my happy places (along with Disneyland, which makes sense, since Vegas is like Disneyland for adults!). I love the lights, I love the atmosphere...and I love the gratuitous sex and alcohol that seeps from the pores of that place! I mean, come on, Vegas rules! And every time I go, I seem to learn something new.
This weekend I learned the following:
~Dice actually have malicious intent. They are not impartial in any way. They want to screw you, and not in the nice "oh, yeah, that's the spot" kind of way either. I mean, I was nice to the dice. I cheered for them, I cared for them. I stopped banging them on the table before I threw them. I mean, what more can I do? Dice are just out to break your heart...but I love them so. It's a vicious cycle.
~Being drunk out of your skull is a brilliant way to haggle and make deals. I watched my good friend, who was obliterated beyond belief, haggle an art gallery from 2400 to 1200 on an original piece of artwork. And he did it by being a completely drunk, beligerant asshole! Amazing! I'm not sure I have it in me to be that mean, but wow, it definately seemed to work!
~Drinking in your room before going out is much lamer than drinking while being out. There's this popular belief, and its a financially sound one, that if you go to Vegas, you should bring some alcohol with you, because it will save you money. Vegas casino bars tend to mark up their alcohol about 1000%, and it can thus get very pricey to get drunk. You can make up for this by getting drunk in the room for a miniscule fraction of the price, and then only having a drink or two while out.
However, this is totally lame. No one wants to spend their time in Vegas in their room, drinking prebought alcohol! I can do that at home, with the door closed, and The Hangover on my TV. If I'm in Vegas, I want to be out IN VEGAS! I can get free drinks while gambling (well, free, except for the money the dice steal from you), but then its off to the bar...and 11 dollar Captain and Cokes. Sigh...just have to budget for it.
~The sportsbook might actually be the best possible place to spend an afternoon in Vegas...if you're awake. I went in to place a bet on, and then watch, the Sharks. But sportsbooks are amazing just for the sheer volume of sports they are showing on all their TVs and screens at one time. And every chair in there is super comfortable. And, because its a gambling room, the cocktail waitresses are making the rounds and giving you free drinks! They weren't even really checking to see if I was gambling or not (my ticket for the hockey game was in my pocket and out of sight). It's awesome! I have a feeling you can probably just wander in, grab a chair, watch some sports, and drink for free if you really wanted to. This is an amazing revelation, and one I will have to investigate further the next time I head back to Vegas!
Well, those are the big ones. 4 days in Vegas (more or less) and 4 things learned. Maybe the cliche is right, but only in Vegas!
Anyways, that's all the insight you get on this somewhat public forum about my Vegas trip. If you want any of the nitty-gritty details, you'll just have to ask me directly! That way I can filter my story for various parties...
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